The Head’s Dilemma

Zoile, quid solium subluto podice perdis? Spurcius ut fiat, Zoile, merge caput. Zoilus, why are you spoiling the bathtub washing your arse? To make it even dirtier, Zoilus, stick your head in it. Zoilo, perché col culo sporchi la tinozza? Immergi il capo, Zoilo, e l’acqua diventerà certo più sozza.

Martial, Epigrams, Book 2, XLII
English translation by Holden Caulfield
Italian translation by Franco Zagato