Jeremy, tell Gordon to tell Tony to tell Boris that you already agree with him

• Heather Stewart, May tells Corbyn it is “impossible” to rule out no deal, The Guardian, January 17, 2019

Theresa May intimated Jeremy Corbyn to immediately join cross-party Brexit talks, as his demand that she rule out a no-deal scenario is “an impossible condition”. Photo: Dan Kitwood/Getty Images.

Oh my gosh, Jeremy! You better tell her that you can’t absolutely cancel an invitation from Gordon and Tony that you have already accepted

• Mikey Smith, Theresa May announces cross-party Brexit talks will start TONIGHT, Daily Mirror, January 16, 2019

In Confidence

Jeremy, please tell Tony to tell Magnus that the situation is serious

Theresa May has lost the vote on her crucial Brexit deal by 432 votes to 202 in what is the heaviest parliamentary defeat of any British Prime Minister in the democratic era. As a result Jeremy Corbyn has tabled a vote of no confidence, which will be debated in the House on Wednesday.

Jeremy, it feels like Theresa is worrying at what Donald might say to Vladimir Vladimirovich. Does she think he will advise him to sue the United States?

• Dan Sabbagh, Theresa May: Donald Trump told me to sue the EU, The Guardian, July 15, 2018

U.S. President Donald Trump holding a joint news conference with United Kingdom’s Prime Minister Theresa May at Chequers, Buckinghamshire, South East England, last Friday. Photo: Jack Taylor/Reuters.

Flop shot

Marchers stream through Edinburgh and group chants “no racist USA” in Ayrshire. [Read more].

• Libby Brooks, Thousands protest across Scotland as Trump plays golf, The Guardian, July 14, 2018

A paragliding Greenpeace protester broke through the no-fly zone surrounding Donald Trump’s Turnberry golf resort in South Ayrshire, Scotland on Friday evening, and, apparently in view of the President, trailing a banner saying: “Trump: well below par #resist”.

An American Werewolf in London

U.S. President Donald Trump with Queen Elizabeth II at Windsor Castle, Berkshire, United Kingdom. Photo: Pablo Martínez Monsiváis/AP.

The Third Script Trailer

A six-metre-high inflatable Trump baby balloon takes off over the Houses of Parliament on Friday to protest the U.S. President’s contentious visit to the UK.

Alexandra Topping (@LexyTopping)

Pray, Jeremy, do not underestimate what jealousy can make a woman do

As U.S. President arrives in the UK, Labour leader says Tories should not be “rewarding” the “politics of division”. [Read more].

• Benjamin Kentish, Jeremy Corbyn: Trump is putting “millions of lives” at risk – but the Tories give him a “red carpet welcome”, The Independent, July 13, 2018

“We are committed to dialogue, including of course with those we strongly disagree with, and in government we would find a way to work with [Trump] administration while also standing up for our values”, Corbyn said. “But instead the Tories are rewarding President Trump with a red carpet welcome. We must show Trump and the Tories that we can and we will defeat the politics of division”. Photo: PA.

Anthony and Cleopatra

Theresa May and Donald Trump holding hands during the grand welcome given to U.S. President and his wife Melania at Blenheim Palace in Blenheim, Oxfordshire, England. Photo: Hannah Mckay/Reuters.

But Jeremy, you know, Boris was thinking instead to give them to Theresa, to decorate her bathroom

Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has promised to return the Elgin Marbles to Greece if he is elected. Speaking to Greek newspaper Ta Nea, Corbyn said it was clear the sculptures “belong to Greece”. “They were made in Greece, and that is where they were for thousands of years until they were taken by Lord Elgin. We should be engaged in constructive talks with the Greek government about returning the sculptures”. [Read more].

• Alys Key, Jeremy Corbyn will return Elgin marbles to Greece if made Prime Minister, City A.M., June 2, 2018

In the same interview, Corbyn also commented on the Greek debt crisis, saying that “Governments must have the freedom to set economic policies that will help the many. State intervention in the economy, ensuring the retention of vital public services or choosing a different path to austerity must all be policy options available to democratic states”. Photo: Getty Images.

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest

Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn meets Betty Keegan with her dog Blossom after visiting Lifford Bridge on the Irish border during the second day of a two-day trip to learn more about how Brexit affects the country. Photo: Liam McBurney/PA.

Jeremy, something tells me that she’s going to name a street after you in downtown London

Britain’s Prime Minister Theresa May speaks at the unveiling of a statue of suffragist Millicent Fawcett in Parliament Square in London, United Kingdom to celebrate the 100th anniversary since British women were first guaranteed the right to vote. Photo: AFP/Adrian Dennis.

Jeremy, even Tony thinks we cannot allow her to destroy all our dreams and wishes

Jeremy Corbyn speaks at the annual conference of the Communication Workers Union (CWU) at Bournemouth International Centre in Bournemouth, Dorset, England. Photo: Andrew Matthews/PA.

Jeremy, Theresa is in very much of a hurry to rebrand herself at your image and resemblance

Theresa May speaks to a worker while visiting to Boss Design during a local election campaign in Dudley, England. Photo: Darren Staples/Reuters.

Thus there remains only one certainty, Jeremy. ¡Hasta la victoria, siempre!

• Robert Tait in Prague, Luke Harding and Ewen MacAskill, No evidence Corbyn was a communist spy, say intelligence experts, The Guardian, February 20, 2018

Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn (centre) talked LGBTQ+ heroes, the need for inclusivity in schools, mental health, Glastonbury 2017, his jam recipe, and much more on Chris Sweeney’s (left) and Will Young’s (right) podcast, Homo Sapiens. Photo credit: Darren Bell/Gay Times.

Jeremy, Theresa just told him that the only one red prince who’s making her breathless is you

British Prime Minister, Theresa May, and President of the People’s Republic of China, 习近平 (Xí Jìnpíng), take part in a tea ceremony at 钓鱼台国宾馆 (Diàoyútái State Guesthouse) in 北京 (Běijīng), China. Photo: Dan Kitwood/Getty Images.

Jeremy, please tell Donald to shut up, as he’s not entitled to give any lessons to anybody. Just remind him that we tolerate him for the sake of democracy, in virtue of our anthropological, cultural, and moral superiority

“Singing army”: Glastonbury Festival-goers cheer for Jeremy Corbyn, 2017. Photo: Matt Cardy/Getty Images.

Jeremy, you know that only Theresa could do such a miracle and make it sound that easy, only for the sake to drive Donald mad with jealousy and rage over you

Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn took over the cover of GQ, but refused to be interviewed by former Tony Blair’s spokesman and campaign director Alastair Campbell for men’s magazine, says editor. See the full shoot and interview in the January/February 2018 issue of British GQ, available on digital download now, or on newstand Thursday, December 7. Photo: Marco Grob/GQ.

Jeremy, since you said that “We are now the political mainstream”, Theresa got crazy and now wants a solo in all our shows. Don’t you think it’s better to be careful and to not provoke her needlessly?

Britain’s Prime Minister Theresa May and Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn attending the Queen’s speech on June 21, 2017. Photo: AP/Kristy Wigglesworth.